Over the holiday break I actually had a bit of time to relax and ‘think’, and came to a few conclusions/decisions.
1. I may have lost the ability to trust (men). I hope not.
2. Weight is something I think I use to hide behind, so that I don’t even get the opportunity to have to trust anyone (men specifically).
3. I’m afraid that I’ve done my daughter a disservice by never even trying to have a relationship (again)… never showing her first-hand how wonderful a relationship CAN be.
4. For a ‘New Year’s resolution’ of sorts, I will strive to begin improving myself physically and mentally, and try to ‘get out more’.
5. I will make an effort to speak more freely with my daughter about my feelings and desires.
Tracking these thoughts (at times) via this blog, I hope, will keep me ‘honest’. 🙂