“11 Signs of Gaslighting in a Relationship” -Stephanie Sarkis Ph.D.

This is only a small part of an article from Psychology Today. It can be found in its entirety here: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/here-there-and-everywhere/201701/11-signs-gaslighting-in-relationship

People who gaslight typically use the following techniques:

1. They tell blatant lies.

2. They deny they ever said something, even though you have proof.

3. They use what is near and dear to you as ammunition.

4. They wear you down over time.

5. Their actions do not match their words.

6. They throw in positive reinforcement to confuse you. 

7. They know confusion weakens people. 

8. They project.

9. They try to align people against you.

10. They tell you or others that you are crazy.

11. They tell you everyone else is a liar.

The more you are aware of these techniques, the quicker you can identify them and avoid falling into the gaslighter’s trap.

“9 Non-Threatening Leadership Strategies for Women” by Sarah Cooper


“When setting a deadline, ask your coworker what he thinks of doing something, instead of just asking him to get it done. This makes him feel less like you’re telling them what to do and more like you care about his opinions.”  😀



Blogs that Pay Writers $50+ for Guest Posts

Guest blogging is one option to getting your name out there or widening your network. Below is one of the most comprehensive, high-quality list* of blogs that accept guest posts compiled and available on the web, most paying $50 (and up) for posts. Some sites want longer articles, but for the purposes of this list, a guest post is a non-contractual appearance on a site. All of these sites are looking for guest writers and freelancers and cover a wide range of fields.


  • Dorklypublishes articles about pop culture. Topics include: anime, video games, movies, and television. They pay $75 per published article, with an aesthetic that runs to the clickbait style. Submission guidelines.
  • Paste Magazinepublishes articles about music, tv, video games, and comedy, with a broad focus on popular culture. They pay $50 for articles. Submission guidelines.
  • Two Plus Two is an online website about poker that publishes technical articles about playing poker, as well as interviews and biographies of poker personalities. They pay $200 per published article. Submission guidelines.
  • Gothamist is a major news and lifestyle blog covering New York City. According to their guidelines, “A well-sourced, 1,500-word indictment of governmental incompetence is just as welcome as a 500-word profile of the rat-slaying building super who listens to Van Halen while on the hunt”. Submission guidelines.


  • The Penny Hoarderpublishes articles about earning, saving, and growing money, and are interested in posts about any and all “wacky and weird ways to make extra money.” They pay $75 for a 700-900 word article. Submission guidelines.
  • The Motley Foolhelps investors make the most of their money and provides financial advice of all kinds. They pay $100 for articles that are “analytically sound, thoughtful, and well-written”. Writers who publish multiple posts will be offered a contract for long-term work. Submission guidelines (click on ‘Personal Finance Writer’).
  • The Dollar Stretcherprovides practical advice about saving money. Their articles range from frugal spending ideas to 401(k) advice. They pay $0.10 per word ($25 for a 250-word article) for pieces that are published in their monthly print publication. Submission guidelines.
  • Doctor of Creditpublishes articles on anything and everything about credit. They welcome pitches on any finance topics, especially sign-up bonuses and money-making opportunities. They pay $50 for accepted guest posts. Submission guidelines.

Technology/Online Business

  • WorkOnlineBlog focuses more on client/contractor relationships, as opposed to SEO or affiliate marketing. They pays $50 to freelance writers, bloggers, contractors, or business owners. Most articles are 1,500 to 3,000 words. Submission guidelines.
  • A List Apartpublishes articles about web design, development, and web content. They pay $200 per article, typically between 1,500 and 2,000 words.  Submission guidelines.
  • SitePoint is a resource geared at web professionals. They’re looking for articles and tutorials on HTML and CSS. They pay $150 for articles, $200 for tutorials, and $300 or more for lengthier pieces that the editors “feel will do well traffic-wise”. Submission guidelines.
  • Treehouseis an educational site for web designers and developers. They publish queries for articles that discuss any area of web design and development, and have a list of possible topics on the site. They pay $100 to $200 per published post. Submission guidelines.
  • AppStormpublishes articles that discuss great business apps for the iPad. They accept queries for reviews, how-to articles, and roundups and pay $60 per article. Submission guidelines.
  • eCommerce Insiders publishes “commentary and insights for online retailers”. Writers should be subject experts on retail, and submissions should be either educational or commentary. They pay $75 for 400-600 word articles and $125 for articles of 600 words or more. Submission guidelines.
  • The Layoutis a daily design publication that features how-to articles on WordPress. Their articles range from 700 to 1,200 words. They pay between $50 and $150 per article, depending on the subject and word count. Additionally, they provide a list of articles they need written that you can choose from. Submission guidelines.
  • wspublishes a wide range of articles and tutorials on Photoshop. They pay $25-$50 for articles, $50 for quick tips, and $150-$300 for full tutorials. Submission guidelines.
  • VPS Web Hostingpublishes a variety of articles on VPS web hosting. They pay $50 for VPS related articles, $100 for how-to guides, and $150 for VPS hosting reviews. Submission guidelines.
  • Polygonpublishes engaging stories based on video game artists, fans, and culture. They pay $0.25 per word ($125 for a 500-word article). Submission guidelines.
  • Biz helps entrepreneurs grow their online businesses. They publish original guest posts that provide helpful tips and strategies, and pay $100 per post. Submission guidelines.
  • Compose publishes articles about database programming and pays $200 per article. Submission guidelines.


  • Scary Mommyhas over a million likes on Facebook. They publish parenting humor, as well as practical advice for moms. Their basic idea: you don’t have to be a perfect mom. They pay $100 per article. Submission guidelines.
  • Babbleis a parenting website owned by Disney. They publish articles in a number of categories including pregnancy, parenting, lifestyle, and relationships. Sources say they pay around $150 for a 1,200 word article. Submission guidelines.
  • Metro Parent is a regional parenting magazine covering Southwest Michigan. According to their website, their general goal is “to have a good mix of fun and substantive local stories of interest to local parents”. They pay as much as $350 for feature articles, and as little as $35 for other pieces. Submission guidelines.
  • Lies About Parenting publishes thought-provoking articles on all aspects of parenting. They accept pitches for articles that share surprising advice, a personal story, or a revelation. They pay $50 per post. Submission guidelines.


  • Great Escape Publishinghelps writers get paid to travel. They accept articles in a variety of categories, including articles about travel blogging, creating your own tours, import/export business, travel writing, and photography. They pay between $50 and $200, depending on the nature of the writing. Submission guidelines.
  • Transitions Abroadpublishes articles on “travel, work, study, living, and volunteering abroad”, and want practical information gained from first-hand experience. They pay up to $150 an article. Submission guidelines.
  • The Viator Travel Blogaccepts pitches for feature length contributions. They want to share an “insider’s view of travel” with a focus on more traditional tourism. They also have a helpful list of cities they need articles about. They pay $100-$150 for features. Submission guidelines.
  • International Living publishes articles on living overseas. They’re looking for unique, personal articles from international writers. They pay $75 for “daily postcards” which share stories from expats. Submission guidelines.
  • BootsnAll is a travel blog geared toward indie travelers. They accept pitches for feature articles that cover a range of topics, from traveler interviews to “indie flight hacking”. They pay $50 per feature. Submission guidelines.
  • DesertUSA publishes all kinds of articles about the North American Desert regions. They accept submissions for several sections of their site, including Wildlife, Adventure, and Desert Lore. They pay $100 per article with accompanying photos. Submission guidelines.
  • The Mountain Blog celebrates “the Mountain Gear Community, its people, and their adventures”, and publishes articles about mountain adventures, trips, and gear. They pay $50-$75 per article. Submission guidelines.


  • Back to Collegepublishes information for adult re-entry students who are pursuing an advanced degree. They accept unsolicited articles that discuss all aspects of the re-entry experience, from finding financial aid to mastering online education. They pay $65 and up for features. Submission guidelines.
  • The Change Agent publishes articles written by adult educators and students. Published biannually, the magazine’s pieces promote advocacy skills and social action. They pay a $50 stipend for accepted articles. Submission guidelines.
  • TakeLessons is an educational site that connects teachers with students. They invite writers to join their team of teachers and submit articles to their blog. Teachers can choose from a list of topics and write a 500-800 word post for consideration. They pay $50 per post by a site-registered teacher; non-teachers do not receive payment. Submission guidelines.


  • Author Magazineis a website published by the Pacific Northwest Writer’s Association. Their mission is to “develop writing talent through education, participation, and accessibility”. They publish how-to articles about writing, as well as emotional/inspirational articles for writers. They pay $50 for articles, and $30 for book reviews. Submission guidelines.
  • Funds for Writerspublishes a weekly newsletter that showcases paying markets, grants, contests, and other opportunities to make money with writing. They’re looking for original articles about any sort of financial tips or paying markets for writers. For a 500-600 word article, they pay $50 via PayPal or $45 via check. For reprints, they pay $15 via PayPal or $10 via check. Submission guidelines.
  • Write Naked is a writing blog focused on the “writing life cut open”. They accept queries for guest posts that discuss the freelance writing life, from publishing trends to a-day-in-the-life of a writer. They pay $50 per guest post; however, if they are “particularly impressed” with a post, they’ll pay $200. Submission guidelines.
  • Make A Living Writing helps writers all over the world find real success in their careers. They accept queries for guest posts that provide “firsthand, practical advice” to freelance writers. In order to query, you must either be a current or former member of the Freelance Writers’ Den or a student or graduate of Jon Morrow’s blog mentoring program. However, they do run open pitch periods. They pay $50 per guest post. Submission guidelines.
  • Writers Weeklypublishes articles that help writers increase their income, and they accept queries for guest posts that focus on selling the written word. They pay $60 for features. Submission guidelines.
  • The SFWA Blog is the official blog of the Science Fiction and Fantasy Writers of America. They want articles related to publishing, writing, and writers. They pay 6 cents per word, up to 1000 words. Submission guidelines.


  • Lawyerist is an online magazine about law practice. They cover topics such as technology, marketing, ethics, practice management, and law school. They pay $100 per article or articles 1,000 words or longer. Submission guidelines.
  • Conspiracy Clubpays $50 for well-researched, fact-based articles about conspiracy theories. They accept pitches for articles and pay $50 for published articles. Typical length is 1,500 to 2,000 words. Submission guidelines.
  • Hakai Magazine “explores science and society in coastal ecosystem”. They accept queries for feature articles. Features range from 1,000 to 3,000 words, shorter articles are around 350 words. When first launched, their guidelines said they pay $1/word. Though pay is not listed on the guidelines anymore, it should still be quite competitive. Submission guidelines.
  • Funny Timesis a monthly humor magazine that publishes funny stories and cartoons. They pay $60 for stories, and all contributors receive a complimentary subscription to the magazine. Submission guidelines.
  • The IWA Wine Blog is the official blog of International Wine Accessories. They publish articles that help wine collectors and connoisseurs store and enjoy wine. They pay $50 per post. Submission guidelines.
  • The American College of Healthcare Sciences (ACHS) Blog publishes informative articles on “holistic health and wellness”. They’re looking for graduates, students, and industry experts with experience in the healthcare field. They pay $50 per post (600-1,000 words). Submission guidelines.
  • The Partially Examined Life is a philosophy blog and podcast that discusses all aspects of various philosophies and texts. They publish thoughtful blog posts and essays that discuss philosophy in any and all contexts. They pay up to $60 per post/article.  Submission guidelines.
  • Submittable is a widely-used submissions portal that publishes its own blog. They accept articles that discuss publishing or digital media, and are also looking for book reviews and essays on any topic, as long as they “of high literary quality”. They pay $50 per post. Submission guidelines.
  • Big Grey Horse seeks Texans to blog about their state, especially if they have experience with travel writing. They pay $125-$200 per pieces, photos required. Submission guidelines.
  • LiisBeth is “a reader and community supported zine that examines entrepreneurship, start-up culture, and the innovation eco-system through a progressive feminist lens”. They pay $500-$1,000 per article. Submission guidelines.

*Credit for the original list goes to Ian Chandler with Freedom With Writing (http://www.freedomwithwriting.com/freedom/uncategorized/44-blogs-that-pay-50-for-guest-posts/).

A 40-agers thoughts… pet peeve on career

Some of my work involves draft contracts, this doesn’t make me an attorney.

Some projects require me to design flyers, brochures, etc., this doesn’t make me a marketing professional.

I am a writer and a grants professional.

I have legitimately worked in this capacity since my employment in a biological oceanography professor’s research laboratory at Texas A&M University back when I was a student there in 1990. After that introduction, all of my future full-time employment positions have been centered in the grants world.

Grants professionals (legitimate ones) hold themselves to a high ethical standard. As professionals, most follow the guidelines outlined by the Grant Professionals Association (GPA), http://www.grantprofessionals.org/ethics;  and the Association for Fundraising Professionals (AFP) http://www.afpnet.org/Ethics.

My pet peeve is… all of the people I run across out there that are marketing themselves as “award-winning grant writers”, peddling their “trade secrets” and “grant award winning strategies” to unsuspecting, desperate people and organizations — no matter their actual field of professional experience, or in what area their educational degrees were attained.

Having a Masters or Doctorate degree in ‘whatever’ does not qualify a person to serve as a professional in any ol’ field or industry that they see fit.

Having a minor/supportive hand in the overall compilation of a grant proposal does not give one the right to claim ownership of its success.

Why do these people think that grants work is a field that’s ‘fair game’?

It’s disrespectful to those of us that have put our blood, sweat and tears into assisting organizations to secure grant funding in support of reputable, society-serving projects and programs.

It’s a disservice to those unsuspecting non-profits and individuals that are simply seeking out some legitimate help in learning how to navigate the federal, state, foundation and/or corporate grant-giving world.

Let’s be professional about all respective careers.

Give credit where credit is due and stop over-inflating our own PR in the interests of prestige and the pursuit of the almighty dollar.


10 Facts Every Woman Should Know:
1. Everyone has rolls when they bend over.

2. When someone tells you that you’re beautiful, believe them. They aren’t lying.

3. Sometimes we all wake up with breath that could kill a goat.

4. For every woman unhappy with her stretch marks is another woman who wishes she had them.

5. You should definitely have more confidence. And if you saw yourself the way others see you, you would.

6. Don’t look for a man to save you. Be able to save yourself.

7. It’s okay to not love every part of your body….but you should.

8. We all have that one friend who seems to have it all together. That woman with the seemingly perfect life. Well, you might be that woman to someone else.

9. You should be a priority. Not an option, a last resort, or a backup plan.

10. You’re a woman. That alone makes you pretty damn remarkable. 

-Austin Blood

today’s New York Times… into rock facts?

lately the New York Times appears to either be turning into a big pile of crap… or adopting the tactic of publishing crap simply to piss people off and increase their readers/site hits… :-/

just one example: